Mothers as Role Models of Positive Self-Image: Things You Can Do To Help Your Daughter Improve Her Self-Esteem and Body Satisfaction

“ I wish I was thinner.” “ I wish my nose was different.” “ I need to lose weight.” These are comments that many women make without really thinking about who is listening. However, for most young girls, comments like these are not going “in one ear, and out the other.” They are sticking in those young girls’ minds and influencing are significantly how our young Latinas see their own bodies.

Research has found that Latina girls have lower self-esteem and less body satisfaction than girls from other racial and ethnic backgrounds. Although it is not completely understood why young Latinas struggle with the issue more than other girls, the influences on their self-esteem are clear. Latina girls continually receive contradicting messages about beauty from school, friends, television, and magazines. However, recent studies have shown that the single most important thing affecting how a girl views her body is her mother’s attitude toward her own body. A mother is an important and essential role model in her daughter’s life. Unfortunately, mothers do not and in what ways always, understand just how much, they are impacting their daughters.

It is important for mothers to be aware of these factors and their effects on young girls so that we can help our daughters deal with them in a positive way. We also must be aware of our own negative views of ourselves and attempt to deal with them for our own health and that of our daughters. Let’s help stop those beauty stereotypes so often portrayed in magazines and on television and help our daughters, and ourselves, learn to love our bodies and our minds just the way they are.

Mothers can take several steps to help increase their daughter’s self-esteem and body satisfaction:

• Talk with your daughter. Listen to her. Encourage her to share her feelings about beauty and stereotypes. Share your views and ask her opinion. Open the lines of communication so that when difficult situations come about, she will be able to talk with you.



• Nurture and spend time with your daughter. Do fun and educational activities together. Go to the movies. Go to a museum. Read a book together about a strong and confident woman. Take your daughter to your workplace.



• Encourage your daughter’s participation in sports and other extracurricular activities. Sports are a fantastic way for girls to increase their self-esteem and learn responsibility, teamwork, and problem-solving skills. Other activities, such as band, chorus, art club, Students Against Drunk Driving, and Student Government also can help a young girl discover and express her talents and improve her self-esteem.



• Watch TV and movies that provide a balanced mix of positive and traditional roles for women.



• Try to exercise with your daughter and practice good eating habits. Learn together about healthy eating habits and create an exercise routine together. Exercise is a wonderful way to reduce stress, improve body image, live a healthier lifestyle, and bond with your daughter.



• Work on a community service activity together. Helping others is a wonderful way to see what truly matters in life (humanity, citizenship, and love). This is a great way to bond with your daughter and teach her positive values.



• Be aware of what you say about your own appearance. You are your daughter’s number-one role model. Try to focus on inner beauty and educational activities that promote yours and your daughter's inner strength and character.



• Remember that beauty is only skin deep. The most perfect looking fashion model can become a hideous creature if she is uneducated, rude, critical, and conceited. The most beautiful and interesting people in this world are those who are kind, educated, and satisfied with the person they’ve become.



• Try not to use appearance-related activities to bond. Don’t always go shopping or to the beauty salon together. Try other activities such as visiting a museum or going to a play.



• Remember that it is okay to seek guidance from a doctor or mental health professional if you or your daughter is constantly angry or sad, or wants to hurt yourself or others. It is okay to talk with a professional about these feelings so that they may be resolved.

As women, we must learn to love ourselves from the inside out. If we continue to judge ourselves by the way we look, our daughters will continue to have eating disorders, low self-esteem, and high suicide rates. Let’s begin to look at ourselves as people, as women determined to help our daughters conquer those beauty stereotypes that make us feel imperfect. Let’s show our daughters the beauty that we have inside ourselves and pass that along so that they can focus on being the next rocket scientist, teacher, or future leader.